New Girl (S05E08): “The Decision”

Review: In order to get Nick and Winston to make a decision for once in their lives, Reagan comes up with a proposal: she’ll sleep with one of them by the end of the day, IF they can decide who. For Nick and Winston, who can’t even decide what to eat for breakfast or what clothes to wear, this proves to be quite a challenge.

To be fair and a gentleman, Nick sets his feelings for Reagan aside. Nick and Winston go back and forth, but after Winston reminds Nick of the time he had dibs on Cindy de la Garza in 5th grade, only for Nick to kiss her in 8th grade, they agree that Winston should be the one.

Reagan is all in (though not really, as she didn’t think they’d actually make a decision), but still manages to plant seeds of doubt. It doesn’t take much for Nick to change his mind that not Winston, but he should be the one. He can’t just put his feelings aside!

Meanwhile, at work, Winston worries that he might not be good enough, but Allie, his partner, assures him that he’ll be fine. He asks her for his best feature – hers is her long neck – and she tells him he has kind eyes. Then, Nick calls Winston to tell him he’s changed his mind. Winston rushes home, where he and Nick come face to face in a cologne stand-off that leaves Nick smelling fantastic! They decide that they have to turn this around and have Reagan be the one to decide, because they’re two overgrown men who somehow(???????) made it to their late twenties/early thirties intact.

So, Reagan gets to choose. She proposes they pitch themselves to her. Nick’s pitch is very convincing, as he mentions that his previous partners have described him as being “Fine. Adequate. It gets the job done.”. Winston’s pitch goes a little differently. He mentions his kind eyes and then starts talking about Allie and everything he likes about her and everything he should have told her was her best feature, aside from her neck. And, what do you know, Winston likes Allie. Like, a lot. Wow, totally never saw that one coming… Winston x Reagan = cancelled!

Winston rushes back to the precinct to find Allie. He asks her out for drinks – as he should have done with Cindy in the fifth grade – and she says yes… If she can bring her boyfriend. Winston is totally cool with his. He’s “Officer DOWN to meet your boyfriend”!

But this leaves Nick and Reagan in a bit of a pickle. To sleep together, or not to sleep together? Or, “your room or my room?”, as Reagan asks. This week is just full of decisions for poor Nick! He retreats to his room so he can think, but when he returns, he’s in the most sex-repellant outfit he owns: orange sweatpants and vest, his “I’m not having sex tonight” outfit. Because, frankly, having sex with Reagan is not what he wants. Not like this, anyway. Awww, kind of sweet, I suppose. And I think Reagan feels the same way.

Schmidt and CeCe also have a decision to make this week: the wedding venue. Seeing as Schmidt has dreamed of his wedding since he was a little boy, this is one of the most important decisions they’ll have to make. Will it be the vacant warehouse, the pest-infected venue or the place that looks like a Mumford & Sons music video but gives Schmidt allergies? Or perhaps, the Lisbon Hotel, that CeCe loves so much it makes her feel like she’s “inside Cate Blanchett”!

But when they see how expensive and gorgeous it is, they figure that there are probably no slots available.

The employee at the Lisbon reveals that there is, in fact, one left in April. But there’s a catch… there’s another couple who wants it. Who? Benjamin, of course, Nick and Schmidt’s ridiculously wealthy friend from college we met a few episodes ago. Benjamin, who used to throw chocolate at a then fat Schmidt, so he’d dance. Though, according to Schmidt, he was already dancing.

Benjamin and his fiancée are determined to get married at the Lisbon and they try to convince the guy at the Lisbon that they should get the slot. The story of how he knew she was the one is called “Lovestruck”, after all, and he was literally struck by lightning! Schmidt and CeCe can’t compete with that, though CeCe does try by claiming they’re cousins and that theirs is a story of forbidden love. Very romantic, indeed! But in the end, they give up, leaving Benjamin with their perfect venue. I’ve got a feeling Schmidt and CeCe might end up at the Lisbon after all, but we’ll see.

At the bar, in her own sex-repellant outfit, Reagan and Nick meet up with Winston and Schmidt & CeCe, who reveal that they’re getting married. In the vacant warehouse! All they need is each other, after all.