Lucifer “A Priest Walks Into A Bar” S01E09 Review

“Stop Me If You Heard This One”

        Life isn’t a porno but that doesn’t stop Lucifer from trying as we start off the episode with the Devil throwing another hedonistic party in his penthouse. Being a gracious host Lucifer invites the Pizza Boy in for some real life fantasy porn fun but the Devil isn’t in the partying spirit… Odd. So Lucifer goes to his therapist without benefits to figure out why. Dr. Martin reasons that Lucifer is feeling lonely even though he’s surrounded by people he doesn’t have one real friend. Could be his recent break with Maze has created this hole. But Lucifer’s day gets brighter when wait for it… A priest walks into his club asking for a favor. Father Frank asks Lucifer to help him with a drug dealer Arrietta who’s using a youth center as a front in order to help a young boy named Connor. Lucifer declines but he can’t resist sticking one to dear old dad so he asks Chloe (who has reservations as usual) to help him investigate to help get some dirt on the priest. Of course instead they find the dead body of Arrietta the supposed drug dealer. Again Lucifer believes it was the priest who turns out to have had a criminal past before becoming a man of the cloth. Stepping off the supernatural train for a minute, Dan and Chloe want to talk about their kiss and it’s meaning but Malcolm crashes the party and tells Dan that now they’re partners. Basically Malcolm has a noose around Dan’s neck and if he doesn’t do as Malcolm says then he’ll tell Chloe everything. But should they be talking about their corruption at a police precinct? Hm.

“Forgive Me Father”

       You’re probably still wondering why Amenadiel brought this dirt bag Malcolm back from the dead (or more accurately Hell). Turns out he brought him back for a specific purpose and Amenadiel makes a point to remind Malcolm that he’s nothing special, serving only a convenient purpose which the angel won’t reveal to us yet. Getting back to Lucifer’s “mission”, he and Chloe go visit Father Frank at his church where to Lucifer’s delight he finds a woman having a moral dilemma. You can guess his stance on fidelity as Lucifer full heartedly encourages the lady to cheat on her husband with his hunky limo driver. Unfortunately the woman was also Father Frank’s alibi so the priest is no longer a suspect. Then just as Chloe was escorting the priest to the precinct to get his statement, there’s a drive by at the church. No one was hurt. For his protection Lucifer takes Father Frank to Lux (mostly to try and tempt the priest; nothing like Naughty Nun Strippers). But instead this plan of corrupting the pious priest back fires and Lucifer ends up kinda liking Frank. They do a fiery duet piano-off as Lucifer learns more about Father Frank’s sinful past. Apparently Connor’s dad and Frank were buddies in a band and Frank was there at the car accident that took Connor’s parents (as well as Frank’s daughter). It baffles Lucifer that the day Frank loses his daughter he finds his faith. Lucifer scoffs at this idea of “God’s Plan”. Chloe suspects that Connor is the new drug dealer “Spider” trying to move in on Arrietta’s territory. Heading back to Malcolm and Dan’s thing. Dan gets Malcolm a gun from evidence lock up. Why? Not sure yet.

“You Got a Friend In Me”

        Still having faith in Connor, Father Frank gives the Devil the slip. Connor was involved in the drive by but he’s not the Spider. Turns out the Spider is Doyle, a counselor at the youth center. Lucifer and Chloe find Father Frank at the church as he’s being held at gun point by Connor with his own devil vs angel on his shoulder thing going on as Doyle tries to get Connor to shoot his friend and mentor who tries to talk him down. Frank’s faith in Connor is rewarded as he doesn’t shoot him but Doyle takes a shot at Connor; no weak links in the drug game. Without a second thought Frank takes the bullet. Surprisingly Lucifer rushes to the priest’s side begging him not to die. Even as he lay dying Frank held faith in “God’s Plan” telling Lucifer that His Father still has faith in him. So the only human who believed that Lucifer MorningStar is the Devil dies?! Seems unfair, which were Lucifer’s thoughts exactly as he took vengeance out on Doyle. If Chloe wasn’t there Lucifer would have left another dead body in the church. Bright side for Connor with his cooperation in the drug case he’ll spend little time in juvi. Shaken by the night’s events Lucifer escapes to his pent house trying to smoke a cigarette on his balcony. Unfortunately the wind keeps blowing the flame out. Lucifer shouts at the heavens, cursing his Father and His so called Plan, calling dad a master manipulator. Too distracted by their own problems, Dan and Chloe reschedule their talk about their kiss. Instead Chloe goes to keep Lucifer company figuring he could use a friend. Chloe and Lucifer do their own piano duet bringing a smile to the old devil’s face on this dark night. Then we finally understand why Amenadiel brought Malcolm back from the dead (although we already guessed). The untraceable gun from evidence will be used to try and kill Lucifer in order to send him back to Hell. Maybe Lucifer should invest in a bullet proof vest.


I give this episode an A. Seeing Lucifer bond with his least favorite kind of person boosted the whole episode. Lucifer may hate his Father even more after this turn of events but he may have discovered that his lovely detective is his only friend on Earth right now where before he was unsure of the nature of their relationship.