Our story begins with Peter’s watching the telly and “The Last Man on Earth!” ( it follows Family Guy) Lois tells Peter to mow the lawn. Thoroughly modern, Peter meets her request and his obligations by getting a herd of goats; from Craig’s List. In another Peter “eww” moment, he milked the goats, although they’re all male. His name is now on the goat’s bathroom wall; “call Peter for a good time” And this warrants another ewww! #nasty
Having no herding skills, the goats run thru the house. They destroy it. It’s a mess! Lois’ parents come through and mama decides, “it’s not a healthy environment” really?! She makes a point to support Lois and her 4 children by gifting her a nanny.
In the meantime, Stewie’s on Amber Alert. He’s riding around in a ’98 Toyota Tercel with a goat. Cleveland later sells goat meat at the neighborhood flea market
Natalia is the nanny & a sleeper agent. #Russia She is looking for a criminal mouse, Fievel Mousekewitz; in a shout to An American Tail, 1986 #throwback However, neighbor and regular rodent, Frank Maxwell’s car explodes. First thought; it’s Natalia. It’s not. “THE Mouse”, Mickey did it. “Tough break, Jew mouse” He laughs, puts out his cigarette and walks away. #Sethcarpet #waltdisney, it’s been a while.
Peter and Lois go on date night. They have fantasy sex in the trunk like hippos. It’s Make Out Point. Peter remembered to put the water in the trunk, yet forgot the lettuce. Another ewww
Lois and Peter get to watch the telly now that Natalia is here. They love the sitcoms and claim “The Middle” as most like their family. So do The Browns (Cleveland) like “Blackish” What?! Does the Asian waiter like “FRESH off the boat” Uh?! ‘Cause Mort likes “The Goldbergs”He’s Jewish! Hey she’s a Pewterschmidt…just sayin’
Thanks to Natalia and all of this free time, our couple decide to go on a trip to a hotel cabin, far-far away. Lois is a poor shotgun and Peter misses his exit. And so begins “the real” of their sacred time together.
Dinner is no longer served after 9:30, they missed it. They don’t like the oatmeal raisin cookies left for the late arrivals. (my fav) There is no telly, no WI fi and there’s a fist sized moth near their bed in the lamp shade. Peter goes to bed immediately, so the time to go home, comes faster! He sleeps with the light on. #moth
Meanwhile, “back at the ranch” Natalia gets into super agent mode when her enemies find her. She nearly destroys the ‘hood, stops Meg & Chris from kissing (ew) while holding Stewie & firing what looks like a sawed off and then a glock.
Brian caught in the exchange is shot. He’s dead; for now. #collateraldamage Making it to the airport, Natalia boards the plane & parachutes Stewie home. He lands safely and wants to do it again! She was a good nanny. #priceless
Now back at the cabin, at first, I didn’t know what was happening. The exchange was rapid and seemed to come out of nowhere. They didn’t miss a beat. It was tit for tat; each holding their own in playing The Dozens! #yomamasofat #hilarious
The dialog exchange was fire! “Which has more clutter, your piano or treadmill? -Really? Let’s go knock on the door of the next room & ask which one of us is fat?- ‘Sorry I’m not Bradley Hooper. You’re thinking of Hooper from Sesame street, who I’d surely bang! He’s a successful business man! – You think you’re the only one in this relationship who wants to be with a successful man?!
Get over yourself! -Do you want these spit droplets back? Sorry, I was tryna scare that fly on your hand…oops sorry, that’s a liver spot! -I hope it’s CAncer.-Oooh if you die can I have all of your nothing? ! I’ve been dead since the minute I said, “I do!” Fine…”Go!” Peter gives her
on the long , silent drive home. I screamed
Although the cabin proved to be a bust for The Griffins; I claim it’s success. They spit the best “dozens” evah at each other. From fat punches, liver spots…rapid fire like an automatic weapon! I was crying! “Tell me how you really feel?!”
Being alone in a cabin. ..far-far away, gave opportunity to keep it real and to really get in touch with their own feelings as well as each other’s. Much needed and a long time coming! ‘Growth for “The Family Guy”
Loved it!
Family Guy airs, Sunday Night, 9:00 p.m. Pacific Time