Real Housewives Of Melbourne (S04E06) “It’s My Party And I’ll Invite Who I Want To”

Well you’d better hope the kids were in bed when you watched this episode. With its haunted house and sex talk it would come pretty close to scoring an R rating. The episode begins with Venus meeting with Gina and Lydia for a coffee and a chat.  We learned in previous episodes that Gina’s father passed away recently. Gina starts sharing her thoughts about possibly seeing a counsellor to help her work through her grief.

Gina says “at the moment, I feel like if someone’s annoying me, or upsetting me, or being nasty, or harassing me, or whatever, I’ve got less tolerance”.

Venus replies “A bit like how I’m feeling now with Gamble”.

Err yeah, that’s the same-ishhhhhhhh.  No, actually Venus, it’s really nothing like that.

Gina tactfully replies with “well I don’t think you even cultivated a friendship with her”.

Venus explains that she now has an issue with Gamble because of the way that she has been behaving towards her.  Venus tells us that she doesn’t understand how Gamble’s life has ever been affected by anything that she’s ever said or done.

I think the audience might be wondering the same thing.

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Gina goes on to say that Gamble has gone through her life getting what she wants by playing a wounded little bird … “all cutesy … and you think that she’s harmless but she’s actually not. She’s got a very nasty, very ambitious side to her”.  Meanwhile, Venus is trying to imitate what she says is a bird noise, but looks more like a marionette whose strings have blown off in the wind. Still, Lydia looks stunned by the bird imitation.

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Gina explains to us that Gamble’s sense of humour at the moment is a bit “skew-whiff” and she accomplished her real purpose, which was to upset Venus.  She then says to the girls that when you lose trust in friendships and see that person throwing shade, “the friendship is like… forget it”.  Lydia then said “that’s how I see Jackie and Janet at the moment” and Gina hammers back a reply; “but they’re not your friends, are you kidding”.

Lydia goes on to explain that Jackie walked away in tears from their conversation at Sally’s party, but she wondered what she said to her that was so bad? Gina explains to Lydia “she feels betrayed”. Lydia goes on to tell us that she thinks that Jackie knows that there’s truth in her saying that Janet gossiped about her behind her back.

Lydia points out to us that Gina is the only other person that can validate the story about Janet gossiping because she was also there when it happened.  Gina tells Lydia that she will say that they were worried about Janet’s relationship with Jackie at the time, but she is not going to go into specifics because she doesn’t want to.  Gina then explains to us that she doesn’t think she needs to back Lydia any further than this as she doesn’t want to drive the point in hard and damage the friendship between Janet and Jackie just for the sake of making a point.

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I think this is the problem with Lydia’s position.  She says that she wants a friendship with Jackie but at the 1st opportunity that Jackie gave her to make up, Lydia shifted the focus to telling Jackie that her best friend is disingenuous.  It’s not really a smart move.  Even with everything that has happened so far, Lydia still wants to keep drilling Jackie with information that will hurt her.  It makes you wonder if her ego and  her need to be right is more important than Jackie’s feelings.  Well it certainly looks that way.  Lydia needs to get down with some Disney and take a leaf out of Elsa’s book in Frozen and just “let it gooooooo”.

Venus then accidentally spills the news that they have been invited to Jackie’s birthday party and Lydia doesn’t look happy when she realises that she hasn’t been invited.

We next see Jackie visiting Chyka to chat to her about walking out of Sally’s party in tears.  Chyka gives Jackie a beautiful crystal Angel that she bought for her and Jackie see’s it as sign that her Angels are watching over her and her relationships.  Jackie explains she is feeling rattled because Lydia has been saying that Janet has gossiped about her behind her back.  Chyka tells Jackie that Janet loves her and would never do that to her.  Jackie also tells Chyka that Lydia said she knew about a fight between Jackie and Chyka.  Chyka burst into laughter and says that the two of them have never had a disagreement.

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Jackie tells Chyka that she hasn’t invited Lydia to her birthday party because she doesn’t want Lydia to spoil it with drama and stories that aren’t true.  She also says that she and Ben are not continuing their cocktail line, and instead will be creating a Boutique Tequila.  They are going to Mexico for this and she has also reserved a beautiful house big enough for all of the ladies. Chyka says that she hopes that the girls behave which is hilarious as we all know what happens when the ladies go away on a holiday.  Jackie tells us that she will call Lydia to try and determine where her head is at before she invites her on the holiday.

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We then cross over to Sally who is meeting with Alex, the Design Director for her new Hotel in Bali which was opening in two weeks from the time of filming. He reports that they have completed Stage 2.  I have no idea what that actually means but sounded impressive! He also said they’ve had an issue with their supplier who went away on a Ceremonial Holiday in Bali without giving them notice.  Sally tells us that this is fairly typical in Bali and she seems fairly laid back about it. Alex also reports that the Day Spa in the Hotel will be ready to view only.  He explained that it’s not a good idea for anyone to walk on the custom tiles that he’s having fitted in the Day Spa and the Plunge Pool because they will just be freshly laid.  Sally looks a bit confused as she says that she thought they decided not to have a Plunge Pool.  Alex explains that it will not be a typical Plunge Pool, but more so a Plunge Pool for ‘ankles’.

A what?

Sally tells us that she may need to travel over to Bali and wear the big boss hat to ensure that everything is ready for her big opening.

We then join Gamble at home with husband Rick and step-son Luke.  Luke says that he has organised a driving lesson for himself.  They share some banter about what to do at stop signs with Gamble joking that that’s when you check your social media. Gamble tells us that she doesn’t get a lot of help from Luke and Rick with household chores.  Gamble also said that she doesn’t like to go down to their wine cellar because she feels like she is not alone in there.  She also sees movement, hears noises and says the hairs on her neck stand up, and she feels spooked. She points out to them that she went down to the cellar that day and her dog remained at the top of the stairs barking at the cellar.  Gamble loves her new house but she believes its haunted.  Rick confirms this and says they’ve all seen things in the corner of their eyes and heard strange noises. Gamble is relieved that it wasn’t flashbacks from a Mushroom trip she took in the 80’s. She tells Rick that she suspects it’s both of his parents that are haunting their wine cellar.

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Rick says that he likes the ghosts and doesn’t want a cleansing.  Gamble says “you might be messing with the Devil a little bit but I think we should have a séance”. She then points to the ceiling and asks us “did you hear that? Are you fucken serious?  You want to talk to us huh?”  I assume she heard a noise just as she suggested having a séance indicating that the ghosts want to communicate with her.

Not if you paid me a million dollars would I hold a séance if I did not know what I was doing. I also wouldn’t be thinking it was Ricks parents that were haunting a wine cellar in a home they have never lived in. Gamble, Luke and Rick then arm themselves with candles and go down to their cellar where Gamble puts a quick stop to the adventure by immediately jumping and shrieking, saying that something touched her leg.

In the next scene, we go to Gina’s house where she’s meeting with her Life Coach and friend Teymara to ask her for words of wisdom.  I wasn’t sure if seeing a Life Coach was what Gina considered grief counselling.  They talk about the passing of Gina’s father and the significant impact its had upon her.  Gina says that its hard to express emotion, but doing so forces her to think about her feelings, which is a positive thing. As her father’s Medical Guardian, she held the often unenviable position of making medical decisions upon his behalf and as she reflects on those decisions, she wonders if she made the right choices, and this carries a sense of guilt for her.  She tells us that she feels as though she’s lost some of her enthusiasm. They identified some of the emotions that Gina was feeling.  They referred to Grief having different stages as well as how trivial some things feel in comparison to mortality.  They also talked about how natural it is to cry at times of loss despite the fact that Gina hates crying and wonders what it’s for. Gina explained to us that she doesn’t want to experience emotions like anger, so she is having counselling to keep it in check.

Cry it out Gina.  To just mention the physical benefits of crying alone, apart from cleaning your eyes we release stress hormones when we cry and then our body produces feel-good endorphins.  Crying also slows down your pulse rate and regulates your breathing, so as I said, cry it all out Gina! Personally, I’ve felt that Gina has been somewhat removed from this season.  Although she has been in all the episodes I think that her grief has played a role in how involved she’s allowed herself to get caught up in drama up to this point.

We then cross over to the ‘Spice Market’ where Jackie’s husband Ben has organised Jackie’s birthday party.  Janet arrives first and Jackie lets her know Lydia hasn’t been invited.  Janet and Jackie hug and agree that nobody could come between them as they are Besties.  The other girls all arrive and Gamble presents Jackie with a certificate for a ‘star’ that she has bought for her.  The girls do Tequila shots and Ben brings out the cake. During her speech Jackie tells the ladies that she thinks they all need to bond and create their sister hood again, and she invites them all to go to Mexico.  A Mariachi band comes out to help them celebrate and the ladies get into some dancing.

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While sharing a toast to the upcoming trip, Venus asks Gamble if they can have a chat before they go to Mexico.  Venus tells us that she feels that they should resolve their issues before going away together to Mexico.  Venus is also new though to the Real Housewives and her intent is by far way too sensible for this show! What follows has to be one of the more bizarre scenes I’ve seen, and I’ve seen a lot.

Gamble tells Venus that every time she has spoken to her, Venus has gone “mental” and acts “like a lunatic”. Gamble raises the night of Sally’s party where Venus confronted her with a picture from the text that Gamble had sent someone who works for Venus. The person she sent it to also happens to be a friend of Gamble’s, but in the last episode it was said that this person was disturbed by the text.  If you missed it, the text was a picture of the dead woman in the Hitchcock movie ‘The Birds’ and apparently Gamble wrote in the text that this would be Venus.

Meanwhile, Janet and Sally are still standing at the table with them and listening to the discussion.  Sally then tells us that every time she sees Venus, she’s pointing the finger and yelling at somebody.  She said that Venus lacks a sense of humour and that she needs to lighten up.  At that point Janet and Sally leave them alone to continue their ‘chat’.

Venus and Gamble begin to argue over the top of each other.  Venus is saying that she doesn’t send pictures of dead bodies to Gambles PR, while Gamble is waving her phone in the air saying “it’s from a movie, it’s from a movie”.  Venus tells Gamble that what she did was wrong and that she needs to learn to apologise, while Gamble continues to call Venus an idiot.  Venus then points out that Gamble is older and needs to grow up, and Gamble replies “you’re 20 years older than me in cosmetic surgery”.  Gamble then explains that bizarre comment to us by saying that “in cosmetic surgery years Venus is about 120 and that you normally wait until you are 60 or 70 to get that much work”.

Gamble: “why have you had so much more work done?”

Venus: “you’re one to talk, you don’t even know what I’ve have done”

Gamble: “oh yes I do darling … you’re this close to being embalmed”

Yes, she really said that! Gamble then tells us that she still has her kit together and then gives us her best version of sucking noises as she mimics the action of having your waist sucked in and your face pulled back.

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Either the scene was scripted for ratings or Gambles behaviour was just monstrous.  Was I the only one wanting to check under her chair to see where the real Gamble was hiding?   Where I come from, women don’t attack other women about their physical appearance.  Gamble went fully overboard and showed a vicious side to her character that we have not seen in previous seasons.

Venus asks again how Gamble knows what surgery she has had done? Gamble replies with “no I think you’re a piece of shit, I think you’re being a C***”

That doesn’t even make sense? Is it the editing, or has Gamble actually lost the plot?

 

Venus then tells us that she was thinking  “who the fuck are you Gamble, if you have a problem, it appears that you’re the looney one if you can’t sit with me and discuss your issue”.

Venus then asks Gamble why she keeps attacking her. While frantically playing with her hair, Gamble replies with “I think you have to be a legit. What are you doing? I can’t understand what you do? I mean I can’t work out what your husband does?”.

Venus then asks Gamble why she cares about what her husband does and Gamble replies “I don’t, but what does he do?”. I know a lot of viewers were wondering what that red herring had to do with their discussion.

Venus then tells us that she was wondering “are you that obsessed, how does it impact your current lifestyle now Gamble? Zero”.

Venus asks Gamble if she’s hallucinating and Gamble suggests that maybe Venus is a hallucination from the 80’s.  I think Gamble was referring to that mushroom trip once again, but I’m beginning to wonder if maybe Gamble did slip some Shrooms into her champagne in this scene because her hostility doesn’t really make sense.  They continue arguing over each other with Gamble continuing to ask what Venus’ husband does for a living.  Venus tells Gamble to “shut the fuck up – I think you just talk shit”

Gamble then tells us that she doesn’t understand what he does for a living, and that is the first question you ask before dating someone. Alright, but Gamble isn’t about to date him, so I’m still lost.

Then, for some light relief, Jackie walks over to their table asking them what is going on. Hilariously, as soon as they start to fill her in, she takes off again faster than the roadrunner.

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Venus eventually answers Gamble with “my husband gives me great oral sex, he gives great oral sex” while Gamble is making “eugh” noises and burying her face in her hands.

Venus then tells Gamble to get over her and her husband so they can move on, but Gamble is too busy making sarcastic comments like “your husband is the essence of my being”. Then, even after all the poison that Gamble hurled her way, I couldn’t believe that Venus tried one more time by telling Gamble that she would love to get to know her.

*sigh*

I don’t think Gamble actually heard her as she responded by thrashing her hair and body about in orgasmic gestures saying “I want him now!” Venus tells her to grow up and then delivers to us the best line of this season so far:

“back off from Venus man, go to Pluto”.

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Gamble walks away saying “go fuck yourself Venus, oh I’m going home to masturbate over James…. Oh James… I’m coming James,…James”. The camera then collects Gambles husband Rick sitting with Janet and Sally.  Janet and Rick look just like Statler and Waldorf from the Muppet Show chuckling away in their balcony seats.

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It’s very clear that Gamble has had no interest in being friends with Venus all season.  She told Rick in an earlier episode that she was jealous of the friendship Venus had with Gina. Is it possible that Gamble could be on a mission to make Venus unhappy enough to want to leave the cast? In Gamble’s first season, she felt she was being given a hard time by a couple of the girls, but I wonder if she can see that what she experienced was nothing compared to the vitriol she’s been spewing at, and about Venus.

 

After the party Gina goes over to visit Lydia.  She tells Lydia that she thinks that it’s a good idea to let the issue with Jackie go, because Janet and Jackie are very upset.  She also tells her that Jackie has invited them to go to Mexico and that she hopes that Lydia would come if Jackie invited her.  Lydia said that she would if they have a conversation first but she doesn’t want to be invited just because Jackie wants to include everyone. Lydia wants Jackie’s invitation to be sincere.  Lydia tell us that she’d be very disappointed if Jackie didn’t invite her and that “it would cut our cords there and then”. Gina told Lydia that she had a good friendship with Jackie and that perhaps they could mend it.  Lydia then said that she can’t be bothered and it drains her. They continue the confusing discussion, leaving me once again unsure if Lydia wants to actually mend fences with Jackie at all.  Gina tell us that she wasn’t confident that Lydia had much intention of letting the issue go, and I agree with her.

In the final scene Jackie is with her stylist Lana organising her wardrobe for the Mexico trip.

Jackie explains to us that she didn’t invite Lydia to her birthday because it was an intimate event with her family and friends, whereas the Mexico trip is a group event, so she doesn’t believe it would be right if she didn’t invite Lydia. Jackie then phones Lydia and tells her that she wants to chat with her.  She tells her that she is hurt that Lydia didn’t reach out to her after Sally’s party.  She also tells Lydia that she would like to invite her to Mexico but she doesn’t want to Lydia to raise the same issue again during their holiday. Lydia says that she can’t promise Jackie not to talk about it.

Lydia then explains to us that if the other women raise the issue with her, she can’t promise that she won’t stand up for herself.  However, Lydia didn’t explain this to Jackie.

Jackie indicates that this is a problem because she doesn’t want to go away on what is also a business trip and have arguments. Jackie stated she wants to move on like adults but if Lydia doesn’t want to do that then she shouldn’t go on the trip.  Lydia then tells Jackie that she understands what she is saying, but then she tells us that Jackie doesn’t really want to move on, and the phone call was only to let other people know she invited her.  Lydia felt that the invitation had conditions attached to it.  Jackie then began asking Lydia why she wants to hurt her and that the invitation was about her and Lydia bonding and moving on – and that was why she was inviting her. Lydia thanked her and they hung up their phones.  Jackie walked off camera with “what a fucken liar’, and Lydia’s comment was that she thinks the Angels might have suggested that Jackie should burn Lydia, but that Jackie will be burning herself instead.

What are your thoughts about this episode?  Don’t be shy – either add to the comments below, or tell me on Twitter @beccamb777

Until next time, have a great week!

Becca Balayance

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