Scorpion (S04E18) "Dork Day Afternoon"

Following Happy (Jadyn Wong) and Toby’s (Eddie Kaye Thomas) unsuccessful attempts to get pregnant and the subsequent negative results of their fertility test, this week’s Scorpion episode involved a race against time to get Toby from his house to the fertility clinic before his sample became inviable and hopefully artificially conceive a Quintis baby.

Having been at an FBI seminar together, Happy and Paige (Katharine McPhee) are making their own way to the fertility clinic. Happy though, is not having a good day. She’s incredibly worried about the appointment, and it shows, with her increasing irritability. She stepped on a wrench when she got out of bed, a rookie FBI agent spilt coffee over her and now they are hitting every red light in the infamously bad Los Angeles traffic. She is taking this as a sign that she is not meant to be a mother, but Paige tries to reassure her that this is just normal random events and accidents that she wouldn’t think twice of on a normal day. It soon becomes apparent that not everything today will be run of the mill events.

Walter (Elyes Gabel), despite his obvious discomfort at Toby bringing his ‘deposit’ with him into the car, is driving Toby to the clinic himself. Being over-prepared as usual, Team Scorpion has worked in extra time for every eventuality, no matter how unlikely. This includes natural disasters but, having seen no sign of an earthquake or flood, Walter decides he has more than enough time to pop into the bank and withdraw some cash. Of course, he doesn’t trust ATMs as they are “a magnet for hackers and thieves”, so he insists on going in to use a teller. Instead of waiting outside for five minutes, Toby decides to follow Walt in, bringing along his “little Tobies” for safekeeping. As Walt is withdrawing $800 in cash (quite what he needs that much for I don’t know), Toby notices something a little off about the bank. The cameras are turned off and the guy who served Walter is a forty-five-year-old trainee. This, amongst others, sets alarm bells off in Toby’s head, and he realises a few seconds too late that this is a bank robbery, and they are about to join the hostages.

Fortunately for the hostages, the bank robbers have no idea that Walt and Toby have their comms in and are talking and communicating with Cabe (Robert Patrick) the whole time. Through carefully worded dialogue with the bank robbers as they are being taken into the back, Walt and Toby are able to tell Cabe that there are eight hostages, the robbers are not afraid to use violence and that they are monitoring LAPD police scanners. Cabe then gets in contact with Sylvester (Ari Stidham) to monitor any police cars in the nearby area and informs the LAPD not to use their radios and to keep all police cars away from the bank for the time being.

cabegallo - Scorpion (S04E18) "Dork Day Afternoon"
Cabe (Robert Patrick, C) was coordinating with the LAPD from the outside

The job of telling Happy of Toby’s current predicament – with less than forty minutes to go until his sperm sample becomes unviable – is placed firmly at Sylvester’s feet and, as you can imagine, Happy isn’t happy and takes this as a further sign that she shouldn’t be a mother. She and Paige barge into an office at the fertility clinic and attempt to hack into the bank’s security footage. Though she is unable to do this initially, she pulls up the schematics of the bank and uses this to instruct Toby where the nearest junction box is so that he can turn the cameras back on for her to access. This gives team Scorpion a distinct advantage, and they soon spot that a carpet cleaning van has pulled up to the side door of the bank and chemical drums are being unloaded and moved into the bank, which Walt immediately surmises are going to be filled with the stolen cash.
Toby meanwhile, still in the ceiling, has found an old pneumatic tube system which still functions and leads outside of the bank. He plans to use this to send the canister of his sperm sample through to Cabe on the outside so he can get it to Happy at the clinic. After verifying that it works with a piece of wood, Toby sends the canister through. Unusually for a member of Team Scorpion, and perhaps an indicator of the situation Toby is in, he didn’t account for the additional size of the canister and it gets caught in the tube before it can reach Cabe. The noise of this also attracts the attention of the robbers, who go to check on the hostages and see Toby hanging out of the ceiling. Furious they pull him down and tie the prisoners up (like a little duct tape could stop Team Scorpion!).

They head back to the vault to fill the drums with the cash, and Happy notices on the security cameras that the reason they are taking so long to stuff cash into empty chemical drums is that they are carefully taking out every dye pack first. This gives Walt an idea. The dye packs used in banks are remotely triggered, so if they can replicate the signal and detonate every dye pack which has been taken out at once whilst the robbers are in the vault, the resulting concussive blast will be enough to render the robbers unconscious. To do this, he will need the exact serial number of one of the dye packs, so he has to make his way into the vault in the time they take to move a full drum to their van and return. After timing them for three drums, Happy has calculated that Walt has approximately twenty-four seconds with which to do so. While he makes it in time and can hold a pack up to the camera for Sylvester and Florence (Tina Majorino) to read, one of the robbers has forgotten the straps he needs to load the drum onto the truck, so he is returning too soon for Walter to leave. Feeling guilty as going to the bank in the first place was his fault, Walter gets into an empty drum, and says to detonate it anyway in the hopes that the drum will protect him. Sylvester and Florence, having found the frequency needed to detonate the pack, are repurposing an antenna that Walter and Ralph (Riley B. Smith) built to communicate with a space station to be able to act as a remote RF trigger. On Walter’s command, they do so, but nothing happens. The team realises that the bank’s blinds, which have been pulled shut by the robbers, are blocking the signal.

Walter volunteers to be the one to run into the main bank entrance to open up all the blinds but to do so he will need a distraction so that he can get past the robbers in the vault with him. Cabe then goes out to the truck, posing as a local business owner angrily shouting at the driver to move his van as he is blocking his deliveries. He riles up the driver so much that the rest of the robbers go out for assistance, and Walt seizes his opportunity to run to the blinds to get them open. He is able to get the blinds open and unblock the signal, but before he is able to tell Sly to detonate the packs, one of the robbers knocks Walt down and holds him at gunpoint. The team look out of options at this point: they can’t leave one robber conscious, if he knows the rest of his team have been taken out he may kill the hostages and make his escape. Walt frantically scans the room and notices that the teller’s stations also have dye packs in them, and the robber happens to be standing at a close enough range to affect the man holding him at gunpoint. He gives Sly the instructions to detonate and sure enough, the three men in the vault are all knocked unconscious, and the robber holding Walt at gunpoint is stunned and Walt is able to turn the tables on him.
The pack detonation also had the added effect of knocking the canister with Toby’s sperm sample in free and he sprints out to the pipe entrance to catch it as it flies from the tube. Checking the time, he realises that he doesn’t have the time to get to the fertility clinic in time. One LAPD officer though has other ideas. His wife and he also had difficulty conceiving so he is more than happy to give Toby a police escort to the clinic and ensure they get there in time. Just before they get there, a woman asks Paige and Happy if they could hold her baby while she fills out some forms and Paige volunteers Happy, telling her that she’s “a natural”. Toby tells Walter that seeing him be a good dad to Ralph has made him confident that he might be able to be one too.
Let’s not forget about the potential budding romance between Sylvester and Florence. Thanks to Ralph, who self-professes that his “wingman game was strong”, Sly decides to ask Florence on a date. Florence agrees immediately but doesn’t realise that it is, in fact, a date. She simply thinks they will grabbing takeout and going home.

Later, when Walt, Ralph and Paige are sitting down for dinner, Walt comments that he hopes everything goes well for Toby, as “he should know how great it all turns out to be”, just as he has.

Best one-liners
Toby: “No-one is dying. Except for the sperm slowly withering away in my pocket.”

Toby: “I don’t wanna fall through the ceiling and spill my semen.”

Walter: “The whole team will work to get you pregnant!”

Cabe: “On behalf of the United States Government, I’m commandeering your Weiner dog.”

Cabe: “Doc I’m waiting for your delivery but nothing’s happening.”
Happy: “Now you know how I feel.”

Cabe: “To hell with you, I’m gonna take this up with my Alderman.”

Toby (on seeing Happy holding a baby): “What, did they just give us one?”

There’s no Scorpion next week, but it will return with a new episode on Monday, March 12th at 10/9c on CBS.