Midnight, Texas (S02E03) “To Witch Hell and Back”

So, this week’s episode brings us a step (or two) farther along the road to the increasingly inevitable Manfred-Patience hookup. The episode picks up pretty much where last week’s episode left off. Manny is lying on the floor of the study and Patience is trying to rouse him. No, not like that, she’s just trying to wake him up. Really, I said one or two steps along the road, not a sprint to the final destination. Sheesh! When Manny confronts her, she is surprisingly blasé about the whole head in a cage thing, saying it’s a powerful relic and the source of Kari’s power. Yeah, I gotta wonder how his followers would feel if they knew that little factoid. They end with a hug which ends awkwardly with Manny untangling Patience’s hair from his bracelet. (More on that later.)

The situation with Fiji and Bobo has come to a head. Or, more accurately, a hand. Ahem. Unfortunately, the only impaling that happens that evening is another accident that ends with a piece of the shattered glass shower door through Bobo’s leg.

Fiji organizes her Wicca class to try to find out who or what is causing the accidents. Manny interrupts them to ask Fiji to cast an intention spell using Patience’s hair. (Aha! Glad to know Manny isn’t yet lost to those ridiculously over done lips!) It seems that Patience’s intentions are good, though that doesn’t mean Kai’s are. Meanwhile, the Wiccan circle has stopped chanting. They know who it is. It’s Fiji. Manny taps into their power, and sees her Aunt Mildred, who is apparently in some kind of witch hell. He agrees to help her, which gives him an out when Patience asks him out for a drink.

Speaking of love triangles, Joe and Walker meet up for a little demon fighting, which they do, followed by hosing the blood off their sexy and naked torsoes. Well, the show never claimed to be subtle.

So, Fiji and Manny are going to open a door to the witch hell, and bring Aunt Mildred back so they can talk to her. But nature, as we all know, abhors a vacuum, (as do I but that’s a whole other story,) so to maintain the balance, Manny has to take her place in hell. He’ll be fine, as long as no one touches him. If they do, he’ll be damned for eternity, for reasons I’m not entirely clear on.

Meanwhile, Olivia and Madonna are having a girls’ night out. But Madonna has an ulterior motive, which involves acquiring a cloth soaked with Olivia’s blood and texting with Olivia’s dad. There’s no way that’s a good thing.

Fiji and Manny open a portal to the witch hell and he does the swap thing with Aunt Mildred. It seems evil witches cursed the family about 800 years ago, and the curse will destroy Bobo. There was only one way that Mildred could save her true love and that was to…wait for it…turn him into Mr. Snuggly! Damn! It seems the curse has nothing to do with sex, but love. As long as Bobo loves Fiji, he’s doomed, even without sex. Uh oh…

Chuy walks in on Joe cutting his hair super short. A big change, especially since that hair probably gets him excellent tips from the cougars (because that’s how it works for my nephew).

Kai’s retreat has been extended. And it seems he took Lyric and Sequioa with him, instead of Patience.

Lem asks everyone to go to the Church, where they each light a candle for Rev. Bobo and Fiji are sitting on opposite sides of the aisle. And Fiji ends their relationship.

I’d like to take a moment to show respect to the awesome Yul Vazquez, whose character Rev left Midnight tonight after revealing that he was never actually an ordained anything. And his name wasn’t Sheehan. And after Kai cured him of his supernatural problem, he decides to leave. (And no, we don’t learn his real name.)

Other things:
– One good thing about Fiji and Bobo breaking up is that really, there’s no good couple name for them. Fibo? Boji? Yeah, no, sorry. Fiji and Bobo are both fairly stupid names to start with. Combining them just multiplies the stupid.
– What do you think Olivia will do to Madonna when she finds out she’s working for Olivia’s father? What do you think Lem will do?
– Does anyone really believe that Walker kissing Joe was just a diversion? Anyone? Bueller? No, I didn’t think so.

Quotes:
“That’s all well and good, Madonna, but you don’t know what it’s like to be a freak, to be a total outsider.”
“Really, honey? I’m a black woman in Texas.”

“The evil in Midnight doomed Creek and me. I’m not going to let that happen to you and Bobo.”

“I’d you get that from your ancestor’s journals?”
“Google.”