Jersey Shore: Family Vacation (S03E05)

This is the episode recap of the fifth episode of Jersey Shore: Family Vacation. This post is dark and full of spoilers.

And we are back!

This episode begins with a continuation of the heavy discussion Ron was having with Vinny and Pauly. Ronnie explains to Team Bromance that although he puts his own business on social media, he does not want to have so many jokes directed at his relationship. Vinny and Pauly inform Ronnie that the only reason they joke so much about his relationship is because he posts his personal life (mainly his relationship issues) ON social media. What a novel concept!

Ronnie also offers up this shocker: Posting his drama on Instagram is his way of asking for help. Instead of texting or calling his Jersey Shore: Family Vacation family, he chooses to share his hardships on social media.

You cannot make this stuff up.

After some serious bro talk, the guys put the drama behind them. Vinny and Pauly teach Ronnie the new dance moves for their routine and they all begin writing their best men speeches.

ron vin pauly - Jersey Shore: Family Vacation (S03E05)
source:decider.com

Jen, Jen, Jen

The elephant in the room is: Will Jen attend the wedding? Lauren  does not mind, but the rest of the crew is uncomfortable at the thought.  Ron and Mike have a heart-to-heart discussion about the situation and Mike gives his blessing about Jen being welcome at the wedding.

Mike is at ease right now.

He reflects about the tumultuous five years prior: 3 stints in rehab, legal troubles and losing all his money.

Mike is at peace right now and is ecstatic that he is marrying his soulmate.

mike lauren 300x240 - Jersey Shore: Family Vacation (S03E05)
source: eonline.com

Tuxedo Time

Mike has presents for the best men! He gives them Italian flag dress socks and bobble head dolls of themselves. The tuxedos arrive with only one problem: The guys do not know how to tie a bow tie. Luckily, the wedding planner Meena arrives to save the day and shows the guys how to tie them.

bow tie failure 256x300 - Jersey Shore: Family Vacation (S03E05)
courtesy: dailymail.co.uk

Pauly shares that he arranged for Rob Base to come and give a surprise performance of his hit song, It Takes Two during their dance routine.

Ronnie is texting Jen non-stop which usually spells disaster.

I Love Having a Wedding This Time of Year

The guests begin to arrive. Uncle Nino forgets that it is 2019 and calls Meena oriental.  While you have to forgive him for certain misdeeds because IT IS Uncle Nino, this is still cringe worthy.

nino 300x169 - Jersey Shore: Family Vacation (S03E05)
source: dailymail.co.uk

It’s Showtime!

The wedding begins. The boys enter one at a time and Mike reiterates that he would not have been able to turn his life around without Lauren.

He truly loves her. (Awwwww)

The wedding spread is amazing. There are pasta stations and sushi stations and stations for every food imaginable.

Jen and Ariana Sky arrive.

Jenni makes awkward small talk with Jen then hightails it out of there. Good choice Jenni. Afterward, Jenni tells her daughter Meilani, about the time she peed behind the bar.

Way to keep it classy, JWoww.

jenni pee - Jersey Shore: Family Vacation (S03E05)
source: screenertv.com

Pauly and Vinny make a pact that if someone punches Vinny in the face then that person is not invited to Pauly’s wedding.

Good idea.

Vinny explains that if Ron stays with Jen then it will alienate him as nobody wants to be around them. The episode ends as everyone is trying desperately to avoid being around Jen.

Jersey Shore: Family Vacations airs Thursdays at 8:00 PM Eastern Time on MTV.